first love

do you believe in first love?

people say that first love is hard to forget..is that true? for me, i believe that past love taught me to love better. many cases , especially married couples divorced because of the power of the first love, question arise, what on earth are they living in? be realistic, and i think person who cant simply forget their first love is the person who has no tendency to success in this world. why look at the back? move on....Love is a gift from Allah and the word FIRST LOVE never exist if we love because of Allah, i am of opinion. people come and they go, that is normal, we cant smell when is our death, it is maktub...wherever we go we belong to the Creator, so why concern with the first love? and break the relationship in order to find a true love, which is first love? i dont understand...yes, i am realistic! i believe that if i cant own something, it is because that thing is not belong to me. if Allah wants me to own it, then it will be mine.

i have a conversation with a single mother who just has been divorced, and she said that her ex-husband is going to marry his first love. i cant believe this kind of joke tht her husband is making. if u still over ur ' fisrt love ' why marry someone else? is that because u need someone to amend the pieces of your broken heart that your first love has left for u? thts is so unfair! and ridiculous. but that is reality! wherever you go you ll find this type of person. to some extend, i wondering, love that he built is just a fake! so how can we know that love is a true love? love has no smell, no taste, thus we cant sense whether that love is true or not. that is what i always afraid of..............

what if you get married and your husband is not entirely happy? and always thought about his first love?.............

what if after you have a children then your husband leaves you?...and that because of his first love....

what happen if love that your husband gives to you, is just a shadow of his first love?....

above all, first love is nothing but a little foolishness.

DOT.


love,

waniey

p/s i am now reading a romantic story about prophet Muhammad (PBUH) and Aa'isyah (ra) , our ultimate example.....

Part of me that you may not know...taaaraaaa ruummm pum!!!!

hye everyone! gud afternoon. =) thank you for reading my blog ( if u read lah..accidentally read or intentionally read or wutever reason it is....) thank you! =) . today is saturday and the weather is not soo good .. raining. ( love it!) .. locked myself in my room as usual. no reading. but sleep all day O_0 .. funny thing is i thought today is monday ... LOL my brain is unable to regenerate the fact that today is holiday. LOL...today's entry is about ME..i want to tell you about me 13 years back then. if rasa boring sila xpayah baca. thank you =)

What i like when i am 12 years old.

as a senior in school you might want yourself to be popular. betol x? me? nahhh.. i like to be in my own world. my frens are among boys. and all of them are from second and third class.. logically, if you are from the first class you may not want to make fren with people from 3rd or 4th class kn? betol x? me different. i like to make fren with them. sbb 2 nakal sama..why? because all of them dr kampung aku...mmg lah aku kwn dengan depa! ishk..so masa standard 6 the most popular game is ' permainan lawan2 pemadam' LOL..suka gila men pemadam ni...the rule of game is easy. u tekan2 pemadam tuh . the eraser will bounce and hits the other eraser of your fren. that means you win! LOL..once win. the eraser is yours! disebabkan aku tak bole menerima kekalahan. i won everytime! and bring back all the erasers home. at home my mother tny..." awat byk sgt pemadam nih?" dok amik pemadam kwn ka kt sekolah" sok p bgi balik" aku jawab " dak aih mak, ni mng game" smbil buat bodoh malas nk layan soklan2 len n cepat2 siap p mengaji Quran...ada ja aku nk jawab bila parents ak tny....mak aku cm2 lah....dia tny skali ja. kalo aku jawab cm malas2 dia xtny dah. nak tau pasaipa? sbb aku kira bdk pandai jugak la kt sekolah n xpenah buat hal... 2 pasai dia xtny sgt...(padahal.....)

ada jual lgi ke pemadam negeri2 ni? nk beli la..hehe

I like comics and benda2 ganas..

i like comics. especially anak-anak sidek n mangga komik. hehehe ( marah aku kalo komik aku ilang). lepas 2 time ni suka beli tora and ding dang pas2 kopok ali baba yg beli pas2 dpt hadiah kt dalam 2..LOL.. slalu ak buli adek aku yg bawah aku. if am12 yrs old he just 7 yrs old..aku akan suruh dia buat mcm2..(kejam x aku?) ...my lil bro has a hobby. he likes to play a gun...pistol cicak yg pasang peluru kaler kuning mcm manik2 ( haih aku nk explain pon xtaw cane) ... kalo tembak cicak , cicak 2 mati tergolek....bayangkan kalo tembak ko? sakit ke x??kalo gugurl like to play masak2 aku suka men pistol cicak tuh...pas2 nk taw aku suka tembak ape? tembak kucing bapak aku!!! aku ulang skali lgi....tembak kucing bapak ak..(jahat kn?)( ganas??...ganas ke kalo nmpak cacing ke ulat bulu ke aku lari mcm xcukup bumi??) kalo nek beskal mmg nak race je keje..xcaya tny bapak aku..brapa kali dia detained me from not having dinner bcause of stupid racing..but after that, i start to change... becoming more and more nerd ( nerd ke??)..nerd 2 maksud aku suka study je....i have fren who always do maths...ari2 dia buat exercise maths... kalo aku nmpak dia aku nampak number...bayangkan...tp aku kawan jugak ngn dia...why?because she likes maths and i hate maths...ko nmpak x sbb aku suka kawan ngn dia? and she is my neighbour =)

13- 15 years old

at this age..i start to read books n novels. novel cinta gitu..novel tuh beli ke? tak lah pinjam je...huhuuhu. and my uncle has lots of books. and because of he likes politics and i always go near his study room. i start to read books about politics..ha jgn xtaw! i read harakah. i read times magazines. i read risalah. i read books about mahathir. about anwar. about conflicts in politics (mse tuh time kes anwar). about reformasi izzah.about pas. and lot more! xpayah tekejut...! dah dia punya study room kt sebelah ruang tamu mmg lah aku slalu pegi c2...menarik dah mcm library. =) if we balik kg...time org busy kt dapur. aku busy baca buku2 pak long aku. time cuti pak long aku pegi sekolah. dia keje. so mmg line clear lah. =) aku baca koleksi kisah-kisah teladan pasal nabi muhammad yg pak long aku nye smpai habeh. i learn about politics because of his books...!!i dont have my own money to buy books myself. my pocket money i use to buy PMR nye buku2 rujukan. yg 2 kalo mintak duit kat mak aku..mak aku sng je bg...hmmm...and duit pocket ill make sure ill save it about around rm 12. nak taw sbb apa? sebab majalah ujang rm 4.00 pas2 komik mangga rm 7.30....mmg lah dok simpan duit nk beli natang tuh! LOL..i am good in writing.. i always get A in my essay. both English and Bahasa Melayu...mcm aku ckp...i hate maths. but got fren who likes maths..so we change expertise. she teaches me maths and i teach her history, and how to write a better essay. =)

16-17 years old.

time nih aku rajen study. so xde aktiviti best sgt pon. nerd mmg cm2..balik sekolah g tuisyen. pas tuisyen balik tgk cita korea..hahaha!...jgn xtaw i like nsync. hehe. i like justin timberlake yoo!lepas SPM aku msuk matrik uia...teros berubah jdi baik! ( maksud aku....aku jmpa kawan2 yg suma tudung labuh smp ke lutut yang solehah yang selalu bagi nasihat dan tarbiyah....and aku RASA SELESA SGT2 KAWAN DENGAN DEPA) =) Alhamdullillah...Allah mmg nk aku jdi baik...ameen...

so that was me back years then.. until now i like to read ujang tuh! las time msa balik kedah i bought myself majalah tuh. then smpai umah my mother ckp " ingat umoq 25 taun majalah cani xbaca la smbil dok gelak2...pas2 p cghita kt ayah aku... lawak ke? ceh!




ok kot ckit2 pasal myself. panjng2 satg melalot plak...

love,

waniey

Easier said than done

Lately marriage seems to be the main discussion. and people around me keep talking the same too. i asked several married couples with regard to this matter , how s life gonna be after married and other problem that may arise in the marital relationship. discussion passed by and i acquired a lot. so i can conclude here, do concern with the financial stability due to the fact that it would become the main problem short after the marriage. other reason is tht not to simply rely on the myth of ' happily-ever-after' marriage as a result of ' love-you-forever' , in fact, analyze other factors that may become issues between you and your spouse.

i keep posting on my wall about marriage doesnt mean that i wanted to boast like ' I WANT TO GET MARRIED' or ' I ALREADY HAVE A BOYFRIEND' or anything else tht would appear in ur LITTLE MIND. NO! that was not my main purpose of doing that. i just need a GREAT MIND to capture my intention and give me advice that i might need in future. that's it!and Alhamdullilah i got positive comments among my friends. and thank you very much to them!

now i want to analyze their comments as it could help me to be more realistic in defining what marriage is all about. some said that the money is the only reason for me not to get married. alright let me briefly say something about me.

i am 25 years old. graduated in April 2009. After graduated , i hve work for 6 months with Jabatan Bekalan Air Negeri Kedah. i quit my job because i want to get a master degree. i am very ambitious and believe that education promise you a better life as well as good ummah. (Islam also encourage us to acquire knowledge too) . now i am study , struggling to get my master degree , and in a meantime i am working with Celcom. i pay for my school. i am a full time student and i work as a full time employee just like anyone else. And i am very independent and not my mummy's little baby. so, now i can adjudge that my financial is not that really good to get married. am i right? so the money as the main reason is acceptable in my case. As far as the marriage is concern is the ability to support the family. as it is important to ensure the family welfare. so can we simply claim that money is a lame excused not to get married?

BUT (see there is a but there, not butt eh) SOMEHOW, i keep pondering, wondering and many 'ing' lagi ...such excuses are not gonna break a tie that we r going to build for the sake of Allah..i believe tht! and i will always believe that! if money is the main problem, i can say that Allah wants me to put more effort on how to overcome the problem. and if i failed to do so, means that i failed the test that Allah has planned for me.

You shall encourage those of you who are single to get married. They may marry the righteous among your male and female servants, if they are poor. GOD will enrich them from His grace. GOD is Bounteous, Knower. (24:32)

In this ayah , we can see that Islam encourages marriage in order to discourage immorality. Islam considered marriage as essential and vital part of Muslim's life. as it can prevent man and woman to commit adultery and the downfall of the ummah. look at the last ayah " if they are poor, God will enrich them with His grace". And Allah continued says :

Those who cannot afford to get married shall maintain morality until GOD provides for them from His grace. (24:33).

As i said earlier, Allah will help us if our intention is good. and i believe tht Allah will help me as long as my intention is for the sake of ibadah. my friend also advice me this. and i noe that there will be wisdom behind it. so, i cant say or simply put several obstacles that hinder me from marry someone i love. and i truly believe that Allah will show me the way as long as i hold on to the faith. IF YOU CANT TRUST OTHERS! TRUST ALLAH, THE ONLY CREATOR! insyaAllah, He will help us.

INSYAALLAH.

so how people? is it easier said than done? make a hundred list what to do or not to do, what are the thing that might be a probability in the future do not help me much. due to it is not happen in my face. so, as i analyze all the comments. i still found tht there is no end to my case. hmmmm

ALLAH KNOWS WHAT IS BEST FOR ME.

love,

Waniey

apabila hati runsing dan mulut mahu berkata-kata

.....dan pabila bulan itu mengambang. maka teranglah segala isi bumi. teeetttttttttt... i nak cite ni. time pegi exam ptd ari 2... bukan nk belagak smbong mahupon belagak konon2 ' i sound silly when i speak in malay' tp sumpah saya mcam xreti buat karangan bahasa melayu. sehinggakan ayat2 smbung pon saya lupa. makanya, ayat2 yg selalu saya ulang adalah. kemudian, kemudian itu, kemudian lagi. begitulah teruknya anak melayu apabila sudah lupa asal usul sendiri. benar kata che det. melayu mudah lupa. kata hang tuah plak. takkan melayu ilang didunia. hang tuah salah! melayu dah pon ilang di dunia. tinggal melayu lalang lali taik ayam saje yg masih kekal...(ohh sorry..saya org melayu) hmmmm.. tidakkah begitu bagai dikata? bukankah benar apa yg deperdngarkan? wahai manusia yang bernama melayu. bangkitlah bangsamu dengan megah! bukan lalang mahupun 'katak dibawah tempurung' oppps ( no political discussion....teeetttt).

so tulah nk ckp 2. ada plak org melayu yg mmg jenisnya bila kita speaking ckp kita belagak ...aduh..apakah yg tekandung dalam enakmen otak-otak mereka? melayu2..melayu lagi..haaa time plak ckap kita merosakkan bahasa bila cakap campur-campur. MANGLISH. eh eh salah ke i nk ckp manglish pon? contoh maglish yg i ckp dan menerima kritikan hebat mereka-mereka ini " i want to berjalan at the park" or i want to makan roti canai with the pulled tea. hah! itu pon mereka mau kritik. katernyer baik rosakan satu bahasa je. hah mcm 2 yer. ok lah tuh...mcm2 lah orang melayu ni. dengki memang takkan abih. alik2 bangsa lain pijak kepala dia. dia kata xpa! orang kencing dia. dia kata xpa. last2 dia jual tanah kt orang, apakah? cuba pikir dgn otak bukan lutut.

culture plak. bila masuk tang culture adat melayu mmg sungguh dijaga bagai nak rak ( apelah aku mengarut ni) ...perempuan mmg WAJIB masak n buat kerja2 dapur. nnt suami kawin lagi satu. tak pun perempuan mesti kena memasak, megemas, mengemop, membasuh, mencuci dan ber mcm2 mem lagi. soklan yang patut ditny adakah dalam islam perempuan yang WAJIB buat keje2 ni????because of the taboo then we , women have to bear all these responsibilities that supposed to be done by men. i say this due to what i know. if you have an argument. make an appointment with me . =)betol ke tak?

itu baru tang culture. tang pembawa mulut pendengki pekhianat? apa plak ceritanya. Malays if they are divided they remain divided, i couldnt agree more! if u work with other bangsa la kn. u hardly find them bad mouthing to each other as compared to Malays. Mengumpat sana sini.dengki mendengki. haaahhh i can say what, if soon, these minorities will take over Malaysia. why? because of the sentiments that they have are stronger than us. as i make myself clear, Malays when they are divided they remain divided!

so fikir2kn lah wahai bangsaku yang otak nya masih dikepala. ( sorry for the 'shitting' words). nowadays aa i talking to you. Malaysian are more obsessed with own culture. political parties now based on ethnic group, that is what had happened in 2008 election, hindraf arise. chinese feel marginalized , what else, indian feel that they are not given the privileges that have been given to Malays. then chaos created, they rebelled and now what happen? you can see kn? kn? 2008 almost the same with 1969 racial riots. now that happened again, who knows this coming election. see what i mean? come on la Melayu! bangunlah bersatu... bukan tunjuk dengan jari telunjuk sapa salah sapa benar, today aaa politicians are big liars. we as a citizen do not know who to believe, and the lalangs follow je mcm hidung lembu kene tarik. see.....people people . we are masters , come on we elected them . we are the people!

haaa bilahati runsing mulut mau berkata-kata mcm ni lah jdinye...bebel

so, jom fikir.

am now reading : Islamic jurisprudence . saja nk nengok hak-hak wanita dalam Islam.

ok ,

love,

waniey

BEAUTIFUL WORDS MADE FOR ME

Terasa sunyi bila kau tiada disisi

aku kesepian sendiri keseorangan

muncul wajahmu dimataku

jelas ternyata yang aku rindu

detik2 bersamamu sentiasa bermain di ingatan

gurau senda, hilai tawa, usikan manja dan belaian mesra

jelas ternyata yang aku rindu

jika kau disisi

akan ku sampaikan bisik hati

ingin aku lepaskan rindu jiwa ini

takkan ku lepaskan kau pergi

tinggalkan aku kesunyian lagi

bagiku kaulah segalanya

perawat luka penyembuh derita

kau yang ku damba dan impi

wahai pemaisuri hati

bersabarlah menempuh segalanya

jika kau merintih

aku menangis

jika kau gembira

aku bahagia

kekallah bersamaku

kerna aku ingin selamanya bersama denganmu

hingga akhir waktu.....

i burst into tears after read it. till now, i feel so touched..n moved to tears. thank you MUHAMMAD FAIZ! thank you so much. thank you for everything. thank you for giving me strength through many obstacles in my path...thank you for keeping me resolute when all around seemed lost . with my whole heart, i love you!

Sunny Sunday with the lazy bumps

today is sunday. i am at my room. my comfy room. hehehe. i dont have any plan for today. as usual reading a book. just start reading ' by the river piedra i sat down and wept' by my favorite author, paulo coelho =). and having a hot nescafe.ngeee. so that what i am doing every weekend if i dont have anywhere to go.

i want to talk about hobby and interest.someone asking me about my interests (my boyfriend that asked me), put it as the main concern, as a woman, he assumes that i like to go for shopping to satisfy the needs. the desire. haha. well i love shopping and would always love it! but not that really choosy. i mean, people always concern about what they wear, concern with the absence of the brand names when they buy things, unlike me, i dont even care whatever brand it is. as long as it fits me well ill buy it. Guess, Gucci, whatever names it is. i dont really care.. i go for shopping if i think i need to go and buy something. and i like to do it alone or with someone who having the same taste as me...so i am normal kn? ( people always talking tht i am a bit weird) who cares! haha.

i have friends among the so called ' alim-alim'..hee . why? because i think they are really good. they would always give me a good advice when i need it. be with me. console me whenever i feel bad. and most importantly, they bring me back to my real existent. to my Creator. so do u think that they like to shop a branded name? they live in a really moderate life as required. so i am most attach to their lifestyle. as i think is good. kn?kn? so that is reason number one.

reason number two. i love books n i would spend hundreds for books. due to i think i dont waste any money buying books as compared to a branded clothes that i think is unnecessary for me to buy...so now you know where my money goes? ngee

i hate make up.and my money save for that.

i have a weird bahaviour as i like to shop shoes. i like shoes. and i dont have reason why i like it. i gave most of my unwanted shoes to my cousins because my sister unfits my size and i dont have any other sister..( adik pon ada dua je.hueh). i am now trying to control such a creepy habit. haha.
....and i dont like places where there are a lot of people .. i am most liking a place with peace and calm instead. now you know who i am. a weird creature. LOL. to the boyfie, yes i am nerd but i am sexy. LOLLLs

i like politics. but hate scandals involve in political arena. since i study politics, so i love to talk and have arguments regarding the issues arise in politics. and i have a number of friend that like the same too. so we share the same interests. but doesnt mean tht i hate to gossip anything else. ( pompuan kn suka buat ketupat.) i got to admit that. i love gossip..

football. YES i loved it! RUGBY?. i feel hard to understand the rule of game. so right now, no interest...

your interest defines you well. am i right? so if i like books, then how u define me?i think i noe ur answer. haha

so that's it! heee.

love,

waniey.

p/s : i love to eat too..in case u dont know.LOL

obsessive compulsive disorder

i heard about OCD once after watch a movie (cant remember which movie) . the movie is about a woman who suffered from an obsessive compulsive disorder. she has kids and always concerns with germs. she would clean her house until she satisfies and she keeps repeating over and over again. now my turn to ask..do i hv OCD?

i think m not tht serious. mayb a mild of OCD. my routine as usual. ill check the main door is locked before going to sleep. ill check it at least 4 times. when i am certain that it is locked then ill go to sleep. before sleep.ill make sure there are nothing uncommon under my pillow.same as it is. then i go to sleep with a rested mind. if i am at home. similar thing i would do. after switch off the tv. i will unplug anything tht i think might cause fire to start. this happen one day when i switched off the main power. everything in the fridge cant be use anymore ( so clever!!) . i will ensure my car locked though i press the remote to lock it. ill check it until i am sure tht it is locked. see!!!

if i wash clothes ill make sure that white clothes are separated, or i will wash it myself without using washing machine until i satisfied. white clothes only. see (again).

dont ask me to take care of ur belongings. i will obsessively care for it. this is due to the fact of an unfounded fears tht people might think towards me that i am failed to do the task.

so. am i considered one of the people who suffer from OCD??? can anyone answer me?? huu...any doctor here? huhu

Travis - Turn

I want to see what people saw

I want to feel like I felt before

I want to see the kingdom come

I want to feel forever young

I want to sing

To sing my song

I want to live in a world where I belong

I want to live

I will survive

And I believe that it won't be very long

If we turn, turn, turn, turn, turn

Then we might learn

So where's the stars ?

Up in the sky

And what's the moon ?

A big balloon

We'll never know unless we grow

There's so much world outside the door

I want to sing

To sing my song

I want to live in a world where I'll be strong

I want to live

I will survive

And I believe that it won't be very long

If we turn, turn, turn, turn

And if we turn, turn, turn, turn

Then we might learn

learn to turn

p/s my fav too. i love this song. it is about dream. to achieve our dream we must be brave. to turn our dream into reality. life is about challenges. maybe uplifting. turning dream into reality. whenever i listen to this song i feel motivated. love travis!

life would be meaningful if we know which sauces to be added

i dont hv any plan for today. going back from work. as usual. ill read some book before going to sleep.i jus jotted down some tasks on the note book. list down the pros and cons ,everything that i need to do this week. things to do things to buy. and the first thing that i wanted to do is to get a book written by Alexandra Potter, calling romeo. sounds interesting to read on weekends =) so it might be not having a-so-really-boring weekend. since i dont have any plan yet , i decided to stay at my room.locked. =)

things number two : i want to have a crystal-table-lamp that i saw at one supermarket on the other day!anyhoo, planning to have it soonest possible. the price? forget about the pricetag! money cant buy happiness..haha. why do i need those crystal lamp by the way? well, it is believe that the crystal lamp enable us to study more often!! hahah (eh suka hati lah)...romantic mood sumore. =).

things number three: wash my car!for whatever reason i have to wash it! covered with dirt already.haiyaa ^_^

things number four: study for ptd's failure club ( huahuahua) study aje lah!!worth every cent =)

things number five : buy toiletries.

things number six : keep my money save .. lalalalal

and that are the lists tht i have done for me so far =) hope it'd me meaningful as long as it is put to the right place =)

love,

waniey

when the rain begins to fall I'll be the sunshine in your life~

Like the sand can seep right through your fingers so can all your days

As those days go by you'll have me there to help you find the way.

The way I feel with you I know it's got to last forever.

And when the rain begins to fall

you'll ride my rainbow in the sky

And I will catch you if you fall

you'll never have to ask me why.

Time goes by so fast

You've got to have a dream

To just hold on.

All my dreams of love began

With the reality of you.

You and I believe

That all our dreams will last forever.

And when the rain begins to fall

you'll ride my rainbow in the sky

And I will catch you if you fall

you'll never have to ask me why.

Though the sun may hide

We still can see

The light that shines for you and me

We'll be together all that we can be.

And when the rain begins to fall

you'll ride my rainbow in the sky

And I will catch you if you fall

you'll never have to ask me why.

And when the rain begins to fall I'll be the sunshine in your life

You know that we can have it all and everything will be alright.

Jermaine Jackson

love,

waniey